Friday, April 11, 2008

Real moments from the past week in the company of The Dictator in Training (we hope benevolent), not necessarily in order

(Referring to the necktie she just swiped from M's rack in the closet)

Can you put this on me? NO! DON'T tie it! And DON'T make it even!


(During her diaper change)

No, Mommy! DON'T Kiss My Belly!


(Referring to Laurie Berkner's voice singing on the CD playing in the car)

Don't sing! Let her sing!


(Looking up the flight of steps before bedtime)

How about I DON'T walk. You carry me. And YOU hold my milk. AND water.


(Referring to my hand resting on the gearshift)

Don't touch that! Hold the wheel! Drive, Mama!


(Referring to the book in her hand)
Read this to me.

-How do you ask for something?

PLEASE. I want you to read this to me. NOW.


(Sitting in the middle lane in traffic at a red light)

Mama, can you tell that car to move? I can't see the building!


(Sitting in the middle lane in traffic at a red light)

Mama, I don't like that truck. It's loud. Tell it to go not next to me!


(Sitting in the middle lane in traffic at a red light)

Mama, make the red circle green. Go now, Mama!


(Conversation with Ms. Lisa as she opened the front door to the daycare for us)

Ms. Lisa: Hi E! Hi L! {tickles L's foot}

E: DON"T Talk To Her! That's my BABY!

Ms. Lisa: That's MY baby!

E: NO! That's MY BABY!

Ms. Lisa: Oh. Well, that's MY girlfriend.

E: NO! L is MY GIRLFRIEND!


(Referring to me closing the door all the way)

NOOOOOOOOOO!!! DON'T GO IN THERE ALL BY YOUR SELF!! AND DON"T GO POTTY RIGHT NOW!!

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